Power Rangers: Ninja Storm 101

Another year, another season....

-Transcript Begins-

Doug Sloan: Ah, after six years I'm free, time to conquer Power Rangers! Hey, intern, do you see what I did there?

Intern: Um....yes, hey, when Saban left, his last act was to chain me to this desk, now I can't imagine this is legal so if you could just-

Sloan: No time for that! It's time to create a new season....a better season, that'll show Saban for firing me in the middle of Turbo...

Intern: So, you aren't going to let me go, then?

Sloan: Absolutely not! Now, what was the Sentai footage all about this season?

Intern: Um....Ninjas, I guess.

Sloan: Splendid, who doesn't like ninjas? Now, I think the Rangers should be students at a ninja academy and, to make them underdogs, they'll be the worst students there.

Intern: Wait, a ninja academy? Where does this show take place?

Sloan: Well, we're filming it in New Zealand, so as to escape the evil socialist regulations of the Screen Actors Guild, but we're going to pretend it's in California.

Intern: So, there's a ninja academy in California?

Sloan: There are many ninja academies in California. Anyway, one day, some bad dude attacks all of the Ninja schools and captures all of the ninja students except for the five Rangers-

Intern: Three, sir.

Sloan: What are going on about.

Intern: The footage has only three Rangers for quite a few episodes.

Sloan: Oh....well, okay, then everyone except for the three Rangers, and so they have to become Power Rangers to stop the villain.

Intern: Wait, so, they're ninja students, but then they become Power Rangers?

Sloan: Precisely. Now, we'll need some characters, first up, I want a Red Ranger who isn't White, I think we're ready for a Ranger leader of color.

Intern: Er....T.J. was black.

Sloan: Bah!


Sloan: How about the first Indian Red Ranger, then? No one's done that before!

Intern: According to the actor's bio, he's Maori...

Sloan: Er....well, in that case, let us never mention his ethnicity so that the kids don't figure out that he's not really American.

Intern: Yeah, about that, it turns out that most of these New Zealand based actors aren't really that good at faking an American accent....and that's having a somewhat problematic effect on-

Sloan: Enough of your complaints! Now, hope about the first female Blue Ranger, that'd be pretty groundbreaking, eh?

Intern: Well, yes, but looking at the footage we have, the Blue Ranger basically has to either be a girl or a crossdresser.

Sloan: Is there a reason that you have to ruin everything. I can see why Saban imprisoned you in this office. Anyway, I've decided that the blue Ranger will be a girl and surfer, end of discussion.

Intern: Okay, and her name?

Sloan: Oh, who cares, it's the girl of team....and, incidentally, I've decided that she'll be the only girl on the team, so how about Tori?

Intern: Wait, only one girl?

Sloan: Yeah, it's not like girls are buying the toys anyway. Hell, I wouldn't have a female Ranger at all if the footage would let me, but no.......they had to include a girl. Anyway, I just remembered that we don't have a white guy or any sort of comic relief, and you need both of those. Fortunately, I have a plan to combine those two characters into one:

Intern: Dustin? Who's named Dustin?

Sloan: Okay, now, the Rangers need a mentor, I was thinking a wise old sensei.

Intern: Well, anything's an improvement over last year's....unpleasantness with Shayla, so I-

Sloan: And he's been turned into a guinea pig.


Intern: Oh, God, why would you do that? Just why?

Sloan: Because I can, little Intern, because I can. Finally, we'll need a villain, now I saw last season, and I noticed one glaring problem with that season's head villain.

Intern: In all honesty, you probably should have found a lot more than one problem.

Sloan: The problem, of course, was that he wasn't wearing a cool mask.

Intern: Well....that's....

Sloan: Finally, Power Rangers is back on track.

-Transcript Ends-